tyrannosaurus-rex:

mineyoung-churyuu:

hubriscomplex:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

8ddict:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

captainlordauditor:

some iconic dialogue that sounds like its from the great canon of literature but are actually from memes

  1. I will face God and walk backwards into Hell
  2. “I’ll do whatever you want” “then perish”
  3. I have been through hell and come out singing

feel free to add more!

  • There are no gods here
  • Do I look like the kind of man who dies
  • God’s dead and soon we will be too
  • I thought there were no heroes left in this world 

• you kneel before my throne unaware that it was built on lies

  • Impudent of you to assume I will meet a mortal end
  • This is hell’s territory and I am beholden to no gods
  • Bury me shallow, I’ll be back

– take this gift, for the gods surely won’t

  • God wishes he were me
  • One day, you will be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe, and you will have to justify the space you’ve filled

Violence for Violence is the Rule of Beasts

ceec-does-fandom:

hellionesque:

argumate:

ms-demeanor:

argumate:

chrisflemingfleming:

back in the subaru

wait I always assumed this guy was a girl

Chris is a forest spirit beyond the bounds of mortal gender. Also possibly some kind of stork.

I’m willing to believe that his arms and legs are conscious entities entirely separate from his body

There’s an Entire Video that breaks down Chris’s stance on gender, and it’s the best thing I’ve seen in years.

we can’t talk about chris fleming and gender without mentioning his hit single, “I’m afraid to talk to men”

tealdeertamer:

iconuk01:

srsfunny:

Wolves React To Gamekeeper Who Had Been Away On Maternity Leave

“WHERE’S YOUR PUPPY! WE WANNA SEE YOUR PUPPY! DID YOU JUST HAVE THE ONE? DO YOU HAVE THEM WITH YOU? ARE THERE PHOTOS?”

I’m not a hundred percent positive but I’m pretty sure this is the wild life center where I visited wolves.

And the safety briefing included the question “So if you’re pregnant, do you want to know or not?”

Turns out there had been a bit of an awkward situation once where the keepers had casually mentioned a woman’s pregnancy in a group, and she herself didn’t even know yet. Turns out the wolves are excellent at telling if you’re pregnant and the keepers can tell based on their body language.  They get all odd and careful around pregnancy. (Even wolves knows that you have to take care of pregnant people.)

So they definitely knew she was pregnant.

And if I remember my BBC documentaries right, a wolf will leave the pack to give birth and introduce the cubs to the pack once she feels ready for it. And maternity leave is flexible but often around 6 months so they’re going “YOU WERE GONE FOREVER! WE WERE SO WORRIED! WHERE ARE THE CUBS?? WE HAVE TO GREET THE CUBS!!“ 

Also the two on her back are fighting over who gets to greet her first. Giving and receiving attention is a commodity that goes by hierarchy and if you don’t accept that there will be scuffles.. The wolf lying down next to her isn’t chill about her coming back, it’s just submissive to the other wolves and waiting for it’s turn to show excitement.

scrap-patch:

meridiangrimm:

meridiangrimm:

meridiangrimm:

meridiangrimm:

I want to read a story about a wizard whose only spell is “fix this”, but the specially-crafted magic takes their intent into account.  "Fix this" can mean repairing the wheel on the adventurers’ cart or healing a broken arm or “fixing” a lock so that it’s in what the wizard considers the “correct” (unlocked) position.  Imagine the other mages getting increasingly frustrated as the wizard stubbornly refuses to learn any other spells.

Wizard: *points at a canyon* Fix this

Other casters: That’s not really how spells –

Wizard: Oh look, one of our blankets is now a magic carpet.  Guess we don’t need a bridge.

Casters: How –

Wizard: *points at logs that won’t catch fire* Fix this

Other casters: There’s been too much rain, it won’t –

Wizard:  I fixed it so that it’s in the same state it was yesterday.  Someone here knows how to start a fire, right?

Casters: What –

Wizard: *points at charging dragon*: Fix this

Other casters: THAT’S NOT HOW MAGIC WORKS YOU IDIOT WE’RE GOING TO DIE

Dragon: *coughs* Did you just… cure my intestinal problems?  I’ve been trying to stop breathing fire for weeks, but it just kept spilling out, and every time I tried to ask for help, I burned everything down.  I won’t forget this kindness.

Casters: *ripping their hair out* H O W

I’m dying 😂👌